Tomorrow is Blessed Mother's Birthday. If you've bumped into Mary Claire over the past month, I'm sure you know. She starts kindergarten tomorrow, so when people ask her what day she starts, she looks at them with a mix of confusion and disappointment ...they should know, of course, which day she would start school. "Blessed Mother's birthday ...of course." she says to them. It is fitting for this little girl to begin her school career on this special day. I've prayed a lot about sending her off. Mary Claire is my first to head from home to kindergarten since Phoebe, so many years ago. When it was Olivia's turn a few years later, we decided to home school. Phoebe came home and stayed until high school. I'm glad for those years having her alongside us.
This is a big year for us because no one will be home ...for schooling that is. I'm mixed about that. There are really so many lovely things about educating your kids at home and I I do believe it's the best way. Phoebe's death has left me depleted, dry. Right now, I'm so grateful to have the option of sending them to school. It tugs a bit at me though, that I've lost the stamina. Its hard to become a person you hadn't imagined yourself being.
So tomorrow we'll walk to the bus stop and Mary Claire will claim her place in line. She will board the bus with Owen ...and drive away. A chapter closed, but another begun and I trust that Blessed Mother's mantle is wrapped around this curly headed girl. I trust she has all of them wrapped tightly under her protection. Moments to be shared that can't be ...Phoebe would have loved watching Mary Claire, miss personality, pursue this great adventure. I'm hoping she is anyway.
I'm grateful for the Blessed Mother and for guardian angels surrounding my children. I just grateful for so many things ...even through the sorrow, I have much to be thankful for.
Eternal rest grant unto Phoebe and may perpetual light shine upon her. May she rest in peace. Amen.
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