Prayer

One of the greatest gifts I've received during these dark days has been the spiritual adoption of my children.  Every Friday for several years now, I've gathered with a group of women and our children to pray the Rosary.  Friendship that forms from such a group, a prayer group, walking through each others' challenges, successes, hopes and worries forges a silent, unbreakable bond.  When Phoebe died, I had only spoken to one of these women that day ...I called her from the hospital as I said goodbye to my daughter ...my moans and cries were hers too ...her two oldest were two of Phoebe's three best friends.  Those moments of shock took hold of us.  The next day, after making arrangements with the funeral home, the funeral Mass already planned, we headed off to finish Phoebe's work of visiting a college in Maine.
Mom, Dad and the kids made the long ride to see the place that had tugged Phoebe's heartstrings ...
Knowing we would have to plan the gathering after the burial, I had put it in God's hands, trusting He would provide ....but I was overwhelmed at the thought of all that effort I would need to muster.  As I sat on the edge of the sea, looking out at the place that would have likely been home to Phoebe next year, I thought of all my friends ...the incredible women in my life, my Rosary group, and so many others who have enriched my life beyond words.  I thought of them and how they had loved Phoebe and how they must ache too ...for me and my family, but also because they had lost someone they loved as well.  I was keenly aware that without God ...and without this gift of friendship ...I would not make it through ...I would die from the pain, the searing, jagged pain that ravaged my body taking root.  Shortly after this, this friend, Kathleen called me, letting me know everything had been taken care of and we were not to worry about anything.  I was stunned as she began to tell me who she was gathered with ...my Rosary group, and all these other friends who have guided me, buoyed me for so long ...all together, preparing and planning ...easing at least the temporal demands for us.
Just before Christmas this Rosary group gave me another gift I had not expected ...each had taken on one of my children to pray for ...to guard and protect.  Again, I was stunned ...even still, because the enormity of that for a mom trying to gain Heaven for her children simply cannot be measured in worldly terms.  I pray for my friends children ...we all do.  But to have each one singled out and paired with a woman of such strong, abiding faith brings it to a new level. 
As Lent begins, and we are called to a deeper prayer life, greater sacrifice, fervent living of the Sacraments of Penance and Eucharist,  I wonder if each of us could take on at least one very specific child of a friend to pray for.  Each child is unique, finding challenging times, all of them, at different points in their life.  If we have a good friend who worries most about one particular child, why don't we prayerfully adopt that child this Lent.  I know it will be an enormous gift, and relief, not to mention source of grace for everyone.  Sometimes us moms grow weary ...even frightened for one child in particular at a given time.  Imagine if we could ease that worry for each other ...Imagine if we offered a tapestry of prayer, so beautifully and intricately woven to present before Christ on the Cross, binding us all together in our love for each others' children.  Don't even ask, just offer it, let a friend know.  It has given me such hope ...and rest, knowing that each of my children is prayed for by someone in particular.  Doesn't mean I pray any less, but it sure feels like my own prayers are fortified, richer ...
I've taken on three lovely young women ...all of them beautiful, spirited, talented and fiercely independent.  Each one extraordinarily lovely ...yet not fully aware of their own power and vulnerability, their ignorance and innocence.  I love these girls, and I've asked the most fiercely independent and powerful girl I've ever known to assist me ...my own darling Phoebe.  Together we are on a mission ...to elegantly, and faithfully usher them into adulthood with peace and purity. 
I can do this because its been done for me ...and I am eternally grateful.

Eternal rest grant unto Phoebe and may perpetual light shine upon her.  May she rest in peace.  Amen.